Why doesn’t anyone want to talk about Caregiver Guilt Part 8?
Is guilt the Caregiver’s silent shame?
So what is the silent shame of Caregiver Guilt?
It is that feeling in the pit of your gut, you know everything isn’t right with your world?
Yet you feel powerless, to do anything about it?
- Have negative thoughts?
- Did you lose your temper?
- Sometimes wish your Loved One’s suffering to just end.
You want to make it better, yet, you are not sure how, and it’s will be another day, soon?
“He/She spent all night on the floor!”
The question is are you wasting a lot of energy on an emotion which has no benefit for you or your Loved One?
Caregivers often get caught up in the spiralling cycle of anger followed by guilt
Whether it is self imposed or imposed upon us, it is important to remember it often leads to feelings of resentment and depression.
Yet, Caregivers often mistake the feeling of guilt with the feeling of resentment.
What is Guilt? Remember – guilt is the feeling we experience when we intentionally cause physical or emotional harm to another person.
What is Resentment? Resentment is the feeling of sadness or disappointment over something that has happened or been done. We regret a loss or a missed opportunity.
If you are experiencing any stressor due to caregiving or life, remember talking to someone as a sounding board can help put things into perspective. A doctor or health professional can also help.
Next time you feel the silent shame/guilt monster closing in on your.
It’s time to start reframing, your thinking.
Instead of thinking I feel guilty about…
I am angry with my Loved One, and I regret I have negative feelings toward him/her right now.
I need some time to myself and I regret that this causes stress for him/her.
Or if you can’t identify what it is simply acknowledge this.
I am carrying a heavy burden and I regret that I feel resentful about that.
Understand there will be times when you say and do things that you wish you hadn’t.
When those things do happen, give yourself permission to be human.
Say you are sorry when you should.
Allow yourself to feel and express regret for the emotion or event & then move on.
You will feel more positive & energised when you focus on something that makes you feel good about yourself and your Loved One
Today write down 3 things you can express regret for – for you today.
Remember you were created to be you!
Create a great day!
Author & Founder of CarefortheCaregiver.org
Remember to Stay Linked, Informed & Educated to Bring Hope, Health & Happiness to the World.
P.S. You are brilliant!