Why doesn’t anyone want to talk about Caregiver Guilt Part 6?
Is guilt the Caregiver’s silent shame?
So what is the silent shame of Caregiver Guilt?
It is that feeling in the pit of your gut, you know everything isn’t right with your world?
Yet you feel powerless, to do anything about it?
- Losing your temper?
- Having negative thoughts?
- Not able to keep promises?
You want to make it better, yet, you are not sure how, and it’s will be another day, soon?
“I can’t find my Loved One!”
The question is, are you wasting a lot of energy on an emotion which has no benefit for you or your Loved One?
Caregivers often get caught up in the spiralling cycle of anger followed by guilt
Whether it is self imposed or imposed upon us, it is important to remember it often leads to feelings of resentment and depression
Yet, Caregivers often mistake the feelinresentments with the feeling of resentment..
What’s Healthy? It’s perfectly normal and acceptable to regret how yours & your loved one’s life has changed as a result of an illness or injury. It’s natural to feel tremendous sadness & disappointment over the progress of a disease.
What’s Not Healthy? It is not healthy for you to stop living your life and accept the responsibility of your Loved One’s condition. You didn’t cause it, You can’t change it! If your body is still healthy, if you can still pursue work/career. If you can enjoy being with family and friends feel grateful not guilty.
If you are experiencing any stressor due to caregiving or experiencing life, remember talking to someone as a sounding board can help put things into perspective. A doctor or health professional can also help.
Next time you feel the silent shame/guilt monster closing in on your.
It’s time to start reframing, your thinking.
Instead of thinking I feel guilty about…
I am angry with my Loved One, and I regret I have negative feelings toward him/her right now.
I need some time to myself and I regret that this causes stress for him/her.
Or if you can’t identify what it is simply acknowledge this.
I am carrying a heavy burden and I regret that I feel resentful about that.
Understand that caring for an aging, chronically ill or disabled person is extremely stressful.
Accept that some days you will get angry.
When those things do happen, give yourself permission to be human.
Say you are sorry when you should.
Allow yourself to feel and express regret for the emotion or event & then move on.
You will feel more positive & energised when you focus on something that makes you feel good about yourself and your Loved One.
Today write down 1 thing you would like to say sorry for.
Remember you were created to be you!
Create a great day!
Author & Founder of CarefortheCaregiver.org
Remember to Stay Linked, Informed & Educated to Bring Hope, Health & Happiness to the World.
P.S. You are talented!